If you think the person you’re dating is too good to be true, they probably are. 

They’re human, and they’ve got some flaws.  The problem is that you’re too head over heels to see them.  That means that this is too dangerous a time to think about marriage.  This may be a good person for you, but until you are able to see that they’re not perfect and may even have some personality traits you dislike, you aren’t seeing the whole picture. When you can view your dating partner as a real human being, you can make better choices about your relationship.    

Three or more people who care about you are concerned about your relationship.

Your dad may not be happy with anyone you bring home simply because he thinks no one is good enough for his “little girl”, or you sister’s personality might clash with that of the woman you’ve been dating.  But if more than one or two people dislike your dating partner, express concerns about how you interact together, or ask you to look more deeply into your date’s background, listen to their concerns.  You may need to date longer before making a decision about the relationship, talk with your dating partner about some of the issues the people who love you have raised, do a more thorough background check even though you’ve been dating a while,  
or consult with a couples’ therapist or a rabbi who is sensitive to couple’s issues.

The preview of coming attractions makes you wonder if you want to see the movie. 

It's human nature to act our best when we start a new relationship and then display our true nature as we become more comfortable with the person we're dating.  Sometimes, though, a date's winning smile and gracious manner is a performance staged for your benefit.  If you'd like an early "preview of coming attractions", take some time to observe how your date treats the many people you come into contact with when you are together. How does she act toward waiters, doormen, taxi drivers and ticket sellers? What is his manner toward pan handlers, bad drivers or inconsiderate louts? Does your date treat others with dignity and respect? How does she react when one of them makes a mistake? Does he treat service people like servants? We hope you like what you see, because chances are that you'll be treated the same way as the two of you get to know each other better. 

You’ve got mixed feelings, but the only one you’re sure about is that you’re getting a lot of pressure to say “yes”.  

 It’s natural to have some doubts during a courtship.  In time, those doubts should be resolved, one way or another.  In order to do so, you may need to talk to a dating mentor to help you sort through your feelings, do a lot of introspective writing and thinking on your own, or speak with a therapist who specializes in helping people with their relationships.  Don’t succumb to pressure to make a decision about marriage before you go through this process.  And keep in mind that if you think that you’re going to feel tremendous relief if you end the courtship, it probably means that this is not the right person for you.

You’re spinning your wheels.  You may need a tow truck to get out of this rut, so get your foot off the accelerator. 

You’re dating a good person who seems to have everything you’re looking for, but you’re not connecting…or there’s a significant something about them that still makes you uncomfortable or there is an issue the two of you haven’t been able to resolve that’s a major barrier to moving forward.  If you haven’t started to connect after a few weeks of dating, or something about your dating partner still bothers you after a month or two, or you’ve both tried for a while to resolve a major issue (such as each wanting to live in a different country, or not being able to reconcile significant differences in lifestyles), it’s time to end the courtship.  You won’t magically connect a month from now, and you certainly won’t learn to like someone after the wedding if you don’t like them before your engagement.  And the issue that troubles you, as well as that problem you can’t resolve, will still be there no matter how much longer you date.